Godzilla gets all the chicks.
Sunday, March 24, 2013
Sunday, March 3, 2013
Monday, February 18, 2013
Saturday, January 26, 2013
Saturday, January 19, 2013
Cat scratch fever
I tried out for cats the musical. They said I didn't have what it takes to make it in the biz. I called a lawyer. The lawsuit went through. The judge was convinced that my singing and dancing skills are amazing. The show ended a week after I made it to Broadway.
Friday, January 18, 2013
Saturday, November 24, 2012
Monday, October 22, 2012
We are very big in sheboygan
We had a great run until our idea was stolden. Who wants to play with a guitar anyway?
Sunday, September 30, 2012
Saturday, September 29, 2012
Saturday, September 22, 2012
Do you like movies about gladiators?
There's no reason to become alarmed, and we hope you'll enjoy the rest of your flight. By the way, is there anyone on board who knows how to fly a plane?
Sunday, September 16, 2012
King Frat
I would do anything to get into a sorority. I learned the hard way that this was more of a cult.
Tuesday, August 21, 2012
Why are you making this so difficult?
I moved to DC looking to get an interview with the president. I disguised myself as a local reporter to be able to get close. The one problem that I was not planning on was him not taking it seriously. With every question he would make a face and a silly voice. What a waste of time and make-up.
Sunday, August 19, 2012
I hate Nick
My buddy Nick was so annoying. Everyone that met him hated him right away. I don't know why but I felt bad for him. Until the day he got into the glove box in my car. I asked him to leave it alone but he couldn't. He was making fun of everything. He found my hat and glasses and did a super insulting imitation of me. It went on and on for about an hour. I opened the door and kicked him out. I was arrested for murder but the judge knew Nick so released me on good behavior only 6 weeks later.
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